Oscar who?
With The Oscars taking place last night (well done to all winners and nominees), I decided it's high time to make my own honorary awards show. Welcome to The Wotsits!
Competition has been tough, and not based just on this past year (that might have been a little unfair). Everyone I've met and everywhere I've been have ridden high in my memory and they are all winners really, but for the purposes of this ceremony…
Sweatiest Mess I've Been In - Edinburgh Royal Art Museum (through no fault of the venue or organisers, I performed like Lee Evans on that occasion, and ended up sweating like, well, Lee Evans.)
Most I've Ever Eaten - At an Indian wedding I performed at, in Duddingston Golf Course, I was invited to sit at a table after my performance. The older gents I joined insisted on filling my plate with delicious foods, again and again. And then came the desserts. And more desserts. And more desserts! It was a pretty great day.
Worst I've Felt Onstage - Performing onboard Brittany Ferries, immediately after suffering from seasickness (while the whole boat continued to wobble side to side)
Most Embarrassing Moment - I performed for the staff of Tesco, Bellshill a few years ago at General Motors in Motherwell and during it, I performed a truck in which I light a card on fire. More than one card caught on fire, I burnt my fingers, threw the cards into the air and shoved my hand into the nearest cold drink (not mine)! For the next few weeks, sleight of hand was not on my set list.
The Showstopper - When I was performing for the families of Carnwath Gala, I picked a little girl to come and help me with a piece of magic. This was about ten minutes into the show, so she has already seen some of what I did. I went to hand her the magic wand, and she didn't take it. I thought she didn't realise I was giving it to her, so I tried again, but this time she backed away. I asked her if she could hold the magic wand, and she just stood there. I didn't know if she was really shy or if there was a condition or issue I hadn't picked up on, so I kneeled down to speak to her and she wouldn't take the wand at all. She told me that she didn't want to hold it because she might disappear. The entire audience broke into a chorus of 'Awwww'. This wee girl truly believed she might disappear, and she stole the show. (I eventually ‘cast a spell’ on the wand so nothing would happen to her, and she eventually took it and had a great time!)
A Few 'Facepalm' Moments - Performingat the Miss Scotland Awards and congratulating the winner, only to find out I was speaking to someone else, who want’t even a contestant…
Teaching a young lad at wedding a few tricks, so he could go and show football manager Roberto Martinez (who was there as a guest) some tricks. I planned to perform for him afterwards and get a photo, but after the kids showed him a couple of things, and got a photo, Roberto left!
Teaching a young last how to vanish a coin, and then being schooled by her in some great magic!
There have been plenty more, but that'll do for now.
